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So, once again, it's been over a year since I've blogged...but this time I won't be so hard on myself.  Life gets busy and sometimes it's just hard to get back to the things we love.  But here I am, typing away at 2am (some things never change).  I won't even try to play catch-up...that's just too overwhelming at this point.  I'll just write a little about what's on my mind today.  After all, that's why I started this blog in the first place...to have an outlet to spill out just a small fraction of the plethora of things that run through my head on any given day.

Today, I've been thinking about our new home.  Actually, that's been on my mind a lot for quite sometime now, considering the length of time we've been working on it.  I call it our new home....and it is new to us...but it is, in fact, a very old home.  We are putting in new plumbing and electrical, an HVAC system, new flooring, cabinets...pretty much everything needed updating.  I've scoured Pinterest for "farmhouse" ideas and have pretty much designed every single room in my head...you know, the kind of designing you would do if your funds were limitless.  But unfortunately we haven't struck it rich yet, so our funds are most definitely limited.  I've often wondered: Will we quite be able to finish it?  Can we continue paying rent AND a house payment while we wait?  Should we hold off on this or should I feel guilty for not holding off on that?  Do we want cozy carpet in the kids rooms or should we face the fact that they will ruin it within a week and cough up the extra money for wood floors?  Should the beams in the living room be painted white or stained to match the floors?  Will we ever actually even live in this house?  Will I lose my mind before we do?!!  

Then one day, while sitting in church, I got slapped in the face with some truth:  That truth was plain and simple: This is not our forever home.  This house we currently live in with a broken a/c in the dead of summer...my parents home that we may move into very soon (for the second time in 6 months)...the "new" house we will prayerfully move into in a few months...NONE of these are our forever home.  Our forever home awaits us in Heaven.  Until then, any place I live here on this earth is temporary.  Y'all, this simple truth immediately took away SO much anxiety and put things into perspective for me!  All of these worries that I have let inhabit my mind truly DO NOT matter.  Coffered ceilings, transom windows, barn doors, even shiplap...yes I said it...even my beloved shiplap is just not important.  Now am I saying that I no longer care about what our new home looks like?  Of course not.  I love interior design.  I am excited about decorating our space and making it our own.  In fact, I believe that my love of design (interior design, clothing design, etc.) is one of my God-given gifts....but that's a post for another day.  Anyhoo...what I AM saying is this...I will no longer let these trivial things worry me.  I will not let it bother me when every single idea in my head isn't able to come to fruition in our home.  We will do what we can and what we can't we will accept.  We will trust that this is God's plan for us and that truth in itself should drive away all of our worries on the matter.  Not only did this sermon remind me not to sweat the small stuff...but it also reminded me to be careful to never become so attached to this house or anything in it that I forget where my real treasure lies.  

Then this week, God spoke to my heart again...in the sweetest way possible.  I hesitate writing this in the middle of a blog about my home...because what I'm about to say...who I'm about to write about deserves an entire blog...an entire novel actually be written detailing his life and the impact he had on others.  So I tread lightly here...but this week, THE sweetest man I've ever been lucky enough to know passed away.  This man was Adam's grandad, Ben Rayford...known to us as "Boompa".  Boompa was an amazing man who touched the lives of so many people in his almost 94 years here.  On the day of his passing, I was able to gather with his family in his home and just be present...supporting, reminiscing, loving, just being a part of an amazing family.  At one point during the day, Adam's cousin, Dionne, shared Boompa's favorite poem with us all.  While Boompa is the sweetest man I've ever known, Dionne is, without a doubt, one of the sweetest women I've ever known.  I was touched that not only did she take note years ago when Boompa told her his favorite poem, but also that she printed it off to read to him during his final hours.  The love that this family shares is so powerful.  That could also be another blog post entirely, but for now, back to the poem.  This poem fits Boompa to a T...but it also describes exactly what I want to be....what I want our home to be.  It is titled "The House by the side of the Road".....and here it is:

The House by the Side of the Road

by Sam Walter Foss (1858-1911)

There are hermit
souls that live withdrawn
In the peace of their self-content;
There are souls, like stars, that dwell apart,
In a fellowless firmament;
There are pioneer souls that blaze their paths
Where highways never ran;-
But let me live by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

Let me live in a house
by the side of the road,
Where the race of men go by-
The men who are good and the men who are bad,
As good and as bad as I.
I would not sit in the scorner’s seat,
Or hurl the cynic’s ban;-
Let me live in a house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

I see from my house
by the side of the road,
By the side of the highway of life,
The men who press with the ardor of hope,
The men who are faint with the strife.
But I turn not away from their smiles nor their tears-
Both parts of an infinite plan;-
Let me live in my house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

I know there are brook-gladdened
meadows ahead
And mountains of wearisome height;
That the road passes on through the long afternoon
And stretches away to the night.
But still I rejoice when the travelers rejoice,
And weep with the strangers that moan,
Nor live in my house by the side of the road
Like a man who dwells alone.

Let me live in my
house by the side of the road
Where the race of men go by-
They are good, they are bad, they are weak, they are strong,
Wise, foolish- so am I.
Then why should I sit in the scorner’s seat
Or hurl the cynic’s ban?-
Let me live in my house by the side of the road
And be a friend to man.

How amazing that Boompa truly lived this out every.single.day. of his life.  Oh how I want to live as he did...as Boompa did....as Jesus did.  How I pray that our home will be like "the house by the side of the road"....always welcoming, always inviting for any and everyone.  May people walk into our home and feel the presence of our sweet Lord.  Sure I look forward to having closets to put things in....and a kitchen with enough space to actually work.  I look forward to having a working A/C....and so many more "things".  But more than anything, I look forward to having a place where people feel welcome. I pray that our kids' friends will always feel welcome and enjoy coming over.  I pray that our family will never even feel the need to knock on the door, but instead, will come on in.  Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to man.  

Find Boompa's obituary here: obituary